5 ways to overcome body hate (Video)
By Tanja, Psychologist for Eating Disorders & Body Image
Have you ever looked at a picture of someone else and lamented how you would love to look like this person with a socially “perfect” body size and shape?
Hi there!
I’m Tanja. I’m a qualified psychologist specialising in eating disorders, negative body image and body hate. I’m also a survivor of anorexia.
My mission is to help you to end your lifelong struggles with food and your body and inspire you to uncover and embrace you true worth. Read more…
Or how often do you look in the mirror and wish that you could lose just 10 pounds? Do you believe that being thinner or more muscular can make you happier, more successful and maybe more accepted by society?
See the full video here or read the full article below. Have fun 🙂
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The sad truth is that even if you lose 10 or 50 pounds, you might still end up hating your body and wishing you could look different. Because the key to living a happier life is not achieving your “perfect” body. To find true happiness, you need to find out what you want and need from life and work towards that.
I often hated my body in the past. I used to feeling like I didn’t fit in to the way society expected my body to look. My pursuit of the illusive “perfect body” and my hate towards my own body went so far that I developed anorexia.
Accepting and loving your body can be a lifelong battle – but it doesn’t have to be.
Here are 5 tips on how to stop hating your body and start embracing your unique beauty.
Do you want to accept your body finally and make peace with it?
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With Tanja – Psychologist for Eating Disorders & Body Image
Categories
Eating Disorder Recovery
Body Acceptance & Body
Love
Intuitive Eating
1. Understand the feelings of hate
What are the feelings that underlie your body hate? What are you really thinking when you look in the mirror and you say to yourself “ I’m fat and ugly”? Is the statement really about you being “fat and ugly” or is it rather that you think something is wrong with you or with what you are feeling? Probably the latter is the right answer.
To say that “I hate everything about my body, because I’m so fat” implies that there is nothing to appreciate about your body. This means that you ignore your body’s other attributes and you avoid addressing your underlying feelings.
Learn to explore and understand your feelings and realise that too much focus on your body is a distraction from what is really bothering you.
2. Focus on your body’s function
With so much focus on what our bodies look like, we forget what they can actually do. So focusing on your body’s function rather than its form can be an effective way to improve your body image and body confidence.
To get into the habit of focusing on function over form, try to complete the sentence “My body can _____________” with as many answers as you can think of. Also think about what each function means to you.
For instance, you might say things like “My body can take me on sightseeing tours, which give me new memories and impressions about the world.”
Doing this exercise daily will help you to value all the parts of your body more and to create a more balanced perspective.
If you want to learn more about how you can feel appreciation for your body, read my article How to love your body: Part 3 – Body Appreciation.
3. Practice body neutrality
If you want to stop hating your body, but just the thought of being able to love your body and yourself seems out of reach, body neutrality can bridge the gap between body hate and body love.
Body neutrality involves respecting and honouring your body, without taking a view on whether it is innately “good” or “bad”. This contrasts with body love, which involves developing an unquestionably positive view of all aspects of your body. Studies have shown that body neutrality is a more realistic approach to improving negative body image than body love.
The purpose of body neutrality is to decrease the focus on the body and on associated positive and negative thoughts.
When you detect a negative thought about your body in your mind, acknowledge that it’s there. Then take some deep breaths and say something that is less hateful and more neutral towards your body. With continued practice, you will change your way of thinking.
If you want to know how how you can practice body neutrality, read my article How to love your body: Part 2 – Body Neutrality.
4. Tune out media messages
How much are you falling for media messages and images about the “perfect” body size and shape? These body ideals are reinforced every day on TV shows, movies, magazine covers, social media, diet ads and even video games – we are overwhelmed with the message that getting thinner and thinner for women and more muscular and ripped for men is better – no matter the cost to one’s physical and mental health.
Out of curiosity and fascination, you might be drawn to these kinds of messages. But if you are honest to yourself, does it really make you feel good and happy with your body?
Comparing yourself to these media ideals is more destructive than you might realise, as it induces guilt and shame and increases the feeling that you and your body are not good enough. Do you really want to experience these kinds of feelings over and over again? Probably not. So start avoiding such messages right now!
Once you start letting go of the concept of the “ideal” body, the disappointment and hate you feel when you look in the mirror or at a picture of yourself will become less and less.
5. Kick your body hate habit
Imagine how much more time you could be spending on enjoyable activities, fulfilling your dreams and making your relationships and careers as rewarding as possible if you stopped hating your body.
To challenge your body hate habit, start by asking yourself the following questions:
- What would happen if you stopped hating your body?
- How would you feel?
- What would you do differently in your life?
- What activities would you do?
- What would you eat?
- What clothes would you wear?
- What would be the focus of your thoughts?
Let the answers that emerge be your motivation to move beyond body hate.
The people who know you won’t remember you because of your body shape and size. People will remember you because of the things you did and your personality.
You don’t need to struggle alone on your recovery journey.
Simply get in touch to discuss how I can help you.
It is entirely possible to overcome an eating disorder or body hate –
I have done it, others have done it and so can you!
Join the Body Acceptance & Food Freedom Collective
Receive a weekly dose of inspirations to help you make peace with your body and food.
Don’t worry, we hate spam too. You can unsubscribe any time.
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Hi there!
I’m Tanja. I’m a qualified psychologist specialising in eating disorders, negative body image and body hate. I’m also a survivor of anorexia.
My mission is to help you to end your lifelong struggles with food and your body and inspire you to uncover and embrace you true worth. Read more…